If I were a bug. You might expect, sadly uninformed readers, that this question might have caught me off guard. Not to say that Sasha warned me about it, oh no. We never tell each other what is being written here. What I meant to say is that I likely spent far more time than the typical person considering what sort of creature I would be- subdivided into phyla, of course. And the bug I would most like to be?
Trapdoor spider, all the way. Now, some of you may not know what these are, and so I will take it upon myself to educate those poor souls who don't know of the Czenidarians. They are medium sized arachnids (by that, I mean about 10 - 15 cm from legtip to legtip), and unlike most other spiders they do not spin a web. Instead, the dig burrow under the ground with hinged lids sitting on top. This feat of engineering is impressive enough for a creature with a brain the size of a pea, but even more than that they will sit directly underneath this flap. And when a suitable prey walks over it- which they sense by feeling the vibrations from the footsteps on the lid, connected to them with threads of silk- they pop the door open, snatch their prey and retrieve it to the safety of their burrow. Genius.
And if any predators were to force the cork open and expose the spider within? Good luck. They can hold their door shut with a force equal to 3 times their body weight. general consensus: trapdoor spiders kick arse. (And yes, I deliberately chose a spider because you killed one. Now this vengeful arachnid will haunt your dreams.)
But I actually enjoyed your scientific discussion a lot. It was truly fascinating. I appreciate your little asides, they really make your writing. And I bet our readers- well, if they exist yet- agree with me.
What do you think 0f religious schools receiving public funding? Yes, I just brought the serious levels up.
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